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The Unorthodox Rabbi
So I asked this rabbi what kind of a rabbi he is, and he said: Unorthodox.
Unorthodox! Yes! The most descriptive term I have heard for real Judaism! The
belief that nothing is the way it is supposed to be, that everything in the
world has to change, that we have to be different from everybody else. This is
what Jews are all about—the recalcitrant, insurgent, revolutionary kvetchers of
history—and what could be more unorthodox than that?
Didn't Judaism begin with the paradigm of all iconoclasts? Imagine Abraham
smashing the idols in his father's house, defying King Nimrod and all the social
norms of his day. Imagine Moses defying Pharaoh, or Rabbi Akiva and the sages
defying the massive Roman Empire. Is this something you would describe as
"orthodox" behavior?
To be Jewish is to rebel. Refusing to answer the phone on Shabbat is a rebellion
against technocracy. Keeping kosher is a rebellion against consumerism. Getting
up early in the morning to wrap oneself in a large, white woolen sheet, twist
leather straps and boxes upon one’s arm and head, join others in mystical
incantations and read from an ancient scroll, is an outright rebellion against
anything considered normal in modern life.
Do you know the story of the rabbi standing out on the street looking for a
tenth for his minyan? Finally, he finds a Jew. But the Jew says, "Sorry, I'm not
into organized religion."
"If this is organized religion," the rabbi exclaims, "what on earth am I doing
out on the street harassing pedestrians?"
Have Jews ever been orthodox? Has there ever been a time when their views and
behavior were considered normal? Pharaoh thought they were crazy because they
demanded workers' rights. The Romans thought they were nuts because they would
not dispose of unhealthy infants. The Church thought they were perverse because
they wouldn't surrender to the faith of the majority. The rationalists thought
they were off-the-wall because of their mysticism, and the romantics considered
them obtuse for their rationalism. The United Nations resolved that Jews are
weird just because they insist on existing. In the meantime, everybody ended up
adopting our mindset, yet we still remain an anomaly among peoples. There's just
too much catching up for everybody else to do.
Judaism can never be called old-fashioned, because it was never in fashion to
begin with.
My Rabbi once said: "Labels are for shirts." Okay, there are other things that
can take labels. Like Reform temples, Conservative synagogues, Reconstructionist
pine groves. But the Jews that you'll find in these places have all just one
label: Jews. Because "Jew" is not a behavioral term. It's an essential state of
being. It's not where you're at, it's where you belong.
So if anyone should ask you to describe the three kinds of Jews today, answer as
follows:
There are three types of Jews:
1. Jews who do mitzvahs.
2. Jews who do more mitzvahs.
3. Jews who do even more mitzvahs.
And that's about it, because a Jew can hardly breathe without doing a mitzvah.
They're just too unorthodox.
--Compiled by Tzvi Freeman
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